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Post by ima283 on May 14, 2017 18:36:31 GMT
Two days ago friday night my husband beat me up for the final and last time..we have two babies 3 year old and a one year old. The police came and arrested him. I am in sooo much pain he kicked me in my ribs, stomach choked me tries to crack my neck..i was in this marriage and abusive marriage for 6 years..i am sooo scared in every way shape and form..please i nees someone to talk to..i feel myself going into a deep depression..please tell me everything is gonna be okay..Everything is piling up on me i feel im gonna fail with these two boys..how did u guys do it??
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janine
Member
Admin
Posts: 1,185 
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Post by janine on May 14, 2017 20:11:49 GMT
There is a lot going on right now for you, and I recommend contacting your local and/or national DV hotline for 24/7 professional support through this, if you haven't already.
It will be ok again. It will be hard to get through those next days/weeks, maybe even months. But you and your kids will be ok again.
Now might be a good time to see a professional counselor if your insurance covers it. If not, most DV shelters have free counseling on site nowadays. You are not going to fail these two boys. By leaving the abuser, you already took the most important step towards providing them with a safe, healthy, and positive future.
This is hard, and it sucks.
But it is temporary, and you are going to feel like yourself again.
In the meantime, call those hotlines, ask professional services for support.
You don't have to do this alone.
oxoxxox
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karen
Member
"Trust Your Journey"
Posts: 1,518
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Post by karen on May 16, 2017 1:16:42 GMT
Hi Ima..my thoughts are with you..I am glad you reached out here, I believe there are many people here who can help you. If it is safe, please feel free to post here when you need to talk.
As Janine said...if you can call a local or national Domestic Violence Hotline..you can speak to a counselor and get direct support. You can leave him and be safe if there is a shelter or support for you. Counseling is golden. I went to my local DV center after being in 3 abusive relationships over 30 years. Each one progressively more severe than the previous one. I got counseling after my last boyfriend was emotionally abusive and kicked me out of the house I was living in with him. It is a long, drawn out story..but with a very happy ending.
I came to this forum in Sept 2014 and found many, many, brave and courageous women and a few men here..whom like you have suffered all kinds of abuse in what was supposed to be trusted and loving relationship. The kindness, the support, the wisdom, the compassion, and the guidance I was given was what helped me to heal. Not one person judged me. Only support.
Many here have similar stories. ABUSE is incredibly widespread, touching all kinds of people, all over the world. I felt like I was in a very dark tunnel..and didn't know how to get out of it. I started to learn about DV, I read a few of the books on this forum and talked to people. I posted here ALOT. And so many people helped me to go forward and heal. I started over, basically, rebuilt my life.
I didn't want to believe it was happening to me. What has happened or is happening to you is very real. And very wrong. AND it is not your fault. It has NEVER been your fault.
This is your husband's fault. COMPLETELY. The best thing, the hardest thing, the most scary thing..is to find a safe place that is away from him. A place for you and your children to go where he can't hurt you or them. Once you are safe..you can then begin to sort out what has happened and put a plan in place with hopefully the help of a Domestic Violence Center supporters or a Women's Aide Center. You are strong and courageous and smart. And your children are blessed to have a strong mother.
It will get better Ima..it may not feel like it or seem like it.but it will. If you told me 3 years ago I would be where I am today..happy, healthy, and strong, I would have told you you were crazy. It will be ok. Take deep breaths, take one hour at a time, and please let us know how you are doing.
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Post by norma on Jun 21, 2017 2:22:03 GMT
This must be so hard for you right now but don't give up and no that it will be ok even if it dosnt seem like that now. No That you have done the right thing by calling the police. That takes strength on its own. It will be the best thing you will do I life standing up to him and not letting him hurt you again and your boys will admire you for protecting them and showing them that it's not ok I have a friend that won't leave here children's dad that abuses here and she excuses his behaviour by convincing here self that here children will have a better life with both parents. And by doing this it has an effect on the children's life that that behaviour is ok. Wich is so saying to see here children effected like this. You should always no that you have done nothing wrong and leaving him will be the best thing you will do and for your kids and that protecting them and yourself from him will show so much strength and courage,
I wish you and your children well xxxx
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